Homecoming

If deployment is one of the most horrible things to go through as a military spouse, the homecoming is one of the happiest. It’s also one of the strangest. Please note that as usual, I have no idea if this is normal or not, it’s just my experience.

After living alone for an extended period of time, you suddenly have this person back in your life. It’s both wonderful and weird. You get into a routine when you’re alone all the time. You sleep in the middle of the bed, you’re the pets’ favorite (ok, I was always the dog’s favorite, but the cat was questionable), and I leave a light on at night because I'm a little afraid of the dark. You get used to doing things a certain way. Once, after a deployment my husband and I were working in the yard. We were finishing up and I went inside for a shower. After my shower, I realized I’d locked him out. I felt awful because it was hot, but I was used to being alone all the time and locking the door behind me when I came inside. This person you missed for so long is suddenly everywhere. It’s great to have him home but it does take an adjustment.

In the 2 homecomings I have experienced, things are unpredictable. You get this email from the “lead spouse” telling you need to be there more than an hour early for snacks and socializing. Then you get a phone call from the “key spouse” telling you that they’re early and the snacks are cancelled (thank goodness, because I was going to fake car trouble or something to not have to sit there). You arrive and they are late anyway.

After the plane lands, you hug while trying to avoid the press. The press doesn’t seem to target us this time since they’re more interested in the family reunions with small children. Then, your husband is lead away for in processing. During this time, they do paperwork and get blood drawn. Yes, blood. Why? Oh, to make sure they didn’t catch any diseases while they were gone…Nice.

In processing can take a while, sometimes more than an hour. I sit in the passenger terminal and text family and friends that he’s home. I update my Facebook, which you’re apparently not supposed to do, but I figured if the base can invite the press, I can inform my friends who I know personally that my husband is home safe. I observe the fashion emergencies in front of me (that will need to be a separate entry, so stay tuned!) and I share them with my friends.

I also tolerate other people’s children during this time. I love kids, don’t get me wrong, but please watch them. I sit reading while a child screams in my ear because his mother is ignoring them and too busy socializing with the other wives. I look at the mother who gives me a nasty glare, as if it’s my fault her kid is being obnoxious. I get bonked on the head repeatedly with a mylar balloon that looks like an American flag (I am not kidding). I get soda spilled on me by a 3 year old whose mother is not watching him. This is not ok.

He has the next 2 weeks off, so we spend that time going on a vacation and seeing family and friends. I gain weight because we are eating at all his favorite spots, but I am just happy he’s home… even if my jeans are a little tight:)

Deployment is such a weird thing. I’ll have to see if I can find my booklet from the family readiness office. It has some odd suggestions for this time. While deployment sucks, and the process for homecoming is weird, it’s ultimately nice to have him home.